Saturday, December 18, 2010

it's a quickie, but not my favorite kind

Today is a day for cleaning (very little of which I can actually do) and attending a lovely little girl's b-day party.  She and her big sister are the kind of children that put me in a better mood.  I'm taking the youngest two and hoping that I can manage them in the car.  I've been driving on a spare for a few days.  I know--idiotic.  But, I keep a check on the pressure and eye it each time b'f I get in the car.  I'll be taking the ole' girl into Bud's Tire on Monday for winterizing and such, but she just has to make it thru the next 2 days with only local trips.  Even though I'm not Catholic, it soothes me to do the sign of the Cross b'f I crank her up.  I did it the other day in front of my Proddy mother and she turned Ghost White.  I explained that it brought me a sense of peace and that no amount of reason could explain it.  This is what happens when you marry an Irish Catholic. 

Tomorrow we host the party for Brendan, turning three.  It is decidedly a low-key affair because a) I am still not ready for lots of activity and b) we are on the edge of being broke and c) he is three and won't remember anyway...is that awful?  Star Wars EVERYTHING. 

Completely unrelated:  Does ANYONE think TRON will be any good?  Why are there already toys for this film?  My husband would go see it and this confirms my belief that it will likely look very interesting, but will suck. 

Monday, I face the surgeon--the one who decides when I can return to work.  I really, really, really hope he allows me to return on the 27th.  I need a few days before my classes start to go through the 3.000 emails that have accumulated in my absence and get ready to teach.  Let us all hope that my x-rays look good.

And then, the time I dread the most--the pre-Christmas spaz-out.  I cannot wrap presents.  I'm a bag person--so much less stress.  But, I don't even know what I've bought--cannot remember--all I know is that I've one person left to buy for and he is the most difficult...my brother.  I'm thinking Game Stop gift certificate--frankly b'c I cannot think of anything else, except maybe Irish Whiskey--Tullamore Dew of course...maybe they have a gift set.  Hmmmmm.

Anyway, I am not looking forward to all the expectations that Christmas heaps upon a Mother.  Everyone is supposed to be full of love and patience and gratitude at all times.  Growing up, I don't remember this ever being true, but the expectation of it became an extra burden.  Another way to give way to disappointment.  I just want a relaxing holiday where things aren't perfect ON PURPOSE.  Is that too much to ask?

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